CYESLY KAMEK SEDIH...KAMEK DAH HANCURKAN HATI SEORANG PEREMPUAN AND KAMEK DAH HANCURKAN HIDUP SESEORANG...
KAMEK MENA2 NYESAL DENGAN APA YANG KAMEK POLAH KAT NYA...
KAMEK MOK YAKINKAN NYA KAMEK SEH SAYANGNYA...TAPI NYA X CAYAK KAMEK..
WALAUPUN NYA SIK CAYAK MEK AND SIK SUKA MEK
TAPI MEK SEH SAYANGNYA GNE2 PUN..
KAMEK X KONTEK NYA KOS MEK TAKUT..KIN LAMAK DI KOL N KONTEK,KIN YA LA NYA SAKIT ATI..MEK X MOK GYA :(
KAMEK SALU MAKSANYA BENCIK MEK...KOS KAMEK TOK LAKI NOK X BERGUNA
APA YANG KAMEK PLH NEKTOK ADALAH SUROH NYA BENCIK MEK AND X SYG MEK GK
TAPI MEK XPAT
MEK NANGIS TIME NANGGA PROFILE NYA
CYESLY :(
GNE2 PUN MEK XPAT LUPAKKANNYA
IM SO SORI GRFLD
PANDA SEH SYG GRFLD :'(
Monday, 20 June 2011
Tuesday, 14 June 2011
A CRAZY MONTH
it's been four months with her and it's been a crazy month for me.We had our fights,quarrels,outings,and i met her family for the first time.
It's been a truly remarkable month,so many memories and so many laughters share together with friends and families.I can never forget any moment which sometimes bring despair,sadness,happiness and meaningful ones.I truly am grateful to be apart of life and all i can say is,i'm riding the rollercoaster and i'm really anxious of what lies ahead of me...It maybe a surprise or just another coincidence.Who knows?
Anyway,it's been four months and from my point of view she's getting matured every single day.I'm fine with that because maturity is what makes us more understanding about life and it's triumph.Sometimes she would think before she speaks and whenever we got ourselves into a fight it would be a short period of fights and quarrels.I knew that she's just trying to work things out the right way and tryin to settle this argument rationally..
I'm happy to be with her and i can't wait for us to get marry.It may sounds like impossible,but nothing is impossible if you are really commited and devoted to the ones you love...
It's been a truly remarkable month,so many memories and so many laughters share together with friends and families.I can never forget any moment which sometimes bring despair,sadness,happiness and meaningful ones.I truly am grateful to be apart of life and all i can say is,i'm riding the rollercoaster and i'm really anxious of what lies ahead of me...It maybe a surprise or just another coincidence.Who knows?
Anyway,it's been four months and from my point of view she's getting matured every single day.I'm fine with that because maturity is what makes us more understanding about life and it's triumph.Sometimes she would think before she speaks and whenever we got ourselves into a fight it would be a short period of fights and quarrels.I knew that she's just trying to work things out the right way and tryin to settle this argument rationally..
I'm happy to be with her and i can't wait for us to get marry.It may sounds like impossible,but nothing is impossible if you are really commited and devoted to the ones you love...
Monday, 13 June 2011
THOUGHTS OF MINE
Today was supposed to be a normal day and a very happy day..But instead things get a wrong turn..When i was on the phone with my lover,i was cracking jokes and all off a sudden she took it so seriously until now...
I don't know what to say,i plead and plead..i've already apologize to her but she won't reply my messages..i try to call her but she won't answer..hmmm,i'm just so confuse.i'm so worried that she would overeact and think about it too much...
At night,i open my laptop and login to my facebook account..I was quite shock to see her online...I look onto her status,she was still thinking about the things i said..I was the one to blame.I know that she was a sensitive person and i've should'nt said such things that could hurt her feelings...I felt so stupid..i've never should'nt done that to her...
Now i'm tryin to rethink my acts...Before this i'm just a heart breaker to her...i never made her felt like i'm the one for her and my love for her is just not enough..Sometimes i think that certain mistake are forgivable and certain mistakes are unforgivable..I know that i made alot of mistakes but she should know that i'm just a human..I can't be perfect all the time.
I just wanted to make her happy,that's all i wished for...eventhough my jokes and everything i've done looked like i'm fooling around but it's not,everything i've done has it's purpose...i've tried to make her happy,i really do..But certain words are meant to be silenced and not to be heard by others...
Maybe we're just opposites...I know that i can't reach your heart,let alone touching it..but,i want you to know that i still love you no matter what.You're too perfect for me and i appreciate what you've done so far..i really do...
I don't know what to say,i plead and plead..i've already apologize to her but she won't reply my messages..i try to call her but she won't answer..hmmm,i'm just so confuse.i'm so worried that she would overeact and think about it too much...
At night,i open my laptop and login to my facebook account..I was quite shock to see her online...I look onto her status,she was still thinking about the things i said..I was the one to blame.I know that she was a sensitive person and i've should'nt said such things that could hurt her feelings...I felt so stupid..i've never should'nt done that to her...
Now i'm tryin to rethink my acts...Before this i'm just a heart breaker to her...i never made her felt like i'm the one for her and my love for her is just not enough..Sometimes i think that certain mistake are forgivable and certain mistakes are unforgivable..I know that i made alot of mistakes but she should know that i'm just a human..I can't be perfect all the time.
I just wanted to make her happy,that's all i wished for...eventhough my jokes and everything i've done looked like i'm fooling around but it's not,everything i've done has it's purpose...i've tried to make her happy,i really do..But certain words are meant to be silenced and not to be heard by others...
Maybe we're just opposites...I know that i can't reach your heart,let alone touching it..but,i want you to know that i still love you no matter what.You're too perfect for me and i appreciate what you've done so far..i really do...
Friday, 20 May 2011
FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT
Lately we've been arguing alot..to be honest,i'm really dissapointed by the way she acts.Everything i do is always wrong and never right.I know lately i've been spending too much time with my friends and my cousin,but that does'nt mean i don't care about you.
We've been fighting ever since that day and i'm sick of it.Maybe my friends are trying to help me and they did,they helped me alot.They gave me advice about how to overcome problems which is related to personal relationship,but the only thing that bothers me is..can it be use? They say if you spoil your lover too much,they will gradually take control of you.Furthermore,they say we should motivate and work hard to make our relationship more mature than before.
I don't know if it's gonna work.But,if there's another fight and i'm really pissed of then i will stop spoiling her.But that does'nt mean i hate her or despise her,i'm just trying to make things right.I wanna straighten things up,i don't wanna have another loose relationship..I wanna have something that i could hold on to and something which is concrete..
The conclusion is,i don't wanna have fights and i don't wanna have to argue with you again..Please,if i can understand you,why can't you do the same?
I still love you for who you are
We've been fighting ever since that day and i'm sick of it.Maybe my friends are trying to help me and they did,they helped me alot.They gave me advice about how to overcome problems which is related to personal relationship,but the only thing that bothers me is..can it be use? They say if you spoil your lover too much,they will gradually take control of you.Furthermore,they say we should motivate and work hard to make our relationship more mature than before.
I don't know if it's gonna work.But,if there's another fight and i'm really pissed of then i will stop spoiling her.But that does'nt mean i hate her or despise her,i'm just trying to make things right.I wanna straighten things up,i don't wanna have another loose relationship..I wanna have something that i could hold on to and something which is concrete..
The conclusion is,i don't wanna have fights and i don't wanna have to argue with you again..Please,if i can understand you,why can't you do the same?
I still love you for who you are
Thursday, 21 April 2011
THE GREAT DEPRESSION
Seriously i'm really piss off and frustrated.I'm frustrated because i cut my hair and i'm piss off because i had to cut it.It all started when i keep a promise to her that i will cut my hair after spm,but i never did.It's because i'm not ready to cut my hair and i have a certainty that i will look bad.
What a stupid promise i made to myself and also her.After a months,i came to a decision that i will cut my hair and i don't want to dissapoint her.Whenever she call me,she would ask me when will i cut my hair.My answer would be i'm not ready yet or i don't wanna cut my hair.But,if answer those i'm dead serious...I never told her about my past and she only knew quarter of it.
When i was in miri,i'm a bit of a nerd and i really have low self esteem and self confidence.It's because my so call "friends" would make a joke out of me and i was a laughing stock in class.Does'nt matter if i was in primary or secondary school,i'm still just a laughing stock...They would called me the alleycats,"sarang tebuan","palak bulat","ball headed boy" and "round up cowboy".Sometimes they would stick something into my hair and just let it stick into me,if i refuse they would say i'm not sporting and open minded.
So i came up with a solution of cutting my hair short,i thought i was all over but i was wrong.They always had a name just in store for me.They would greet me and say,"kck na rmbut ko jat,kdk muka sek" i ingnored those comments..i still remember they called me "shit head".
That's what happened to me in the past,eventhough some of my friends keep encouraging me and try to gave me some confidence.But i still lack of it.
But everything changed when i came to kuching,my friends would say my hair is "rugged" or "kacak".they were encouraging me to keep my hair long or just maintain the same.But sometimes,i have to follow by the school rules.Whenever i cut my hair short,they would say "syg rmbut ko pendek,da x ensem gk.P kin macho." I'm really flatered by their comments and to be honest they never called me names or say hurtful thing to me.I really appreciate as friends and as best bro's.
But thing does'nt run as smoothly as i thought it would be,some people were just too over their heads.They would laugh at me when i cut my hair short,i remember them.
Sometimes when i cut my hair,i would lost self confidence,SERIOUSLY..I would'nt go out with my family or with my friends.I would stay at home doing nothing and try to gain back my confidence level quickly.
Now i'm not mad at her,i'm just very dissapointed.I did this because i don't wanna make you dissapointed in me and i don't want you to get fed up of reminding me to cut my hair.Senang crita la,panda mok jaga ati garfield and panda xda niat mok plh garfield sdih..I'm sorry if lately i don't wanna text you or call you.I just need a little time alone..Hope you understand.
Remember this,I STILL LOVE YOU NO MATTER WHAT and I REALLY MISS YOU.
What a stupid promise i made to myself and also her.After a months,i came to a decision that i will cut my hair and i don't want to dissapoint her.Whenever she call me,she would ask me when will i cut my hair.My answer would be i'm not ready yet or i don't wanna cut my hair.But,if answer those i'm dead serious...I never told her about my past and she only knew quarter of it.
When i was in miri,i'm a bit of a nerd and i really have low self esteem and self confidence.It's because my so call "friends" would make a joke out of me and i was a laughing stock in class.Does'nt matter if i was in primary or secondary school,i'm still just a laughing stock...They would called me the alleycats,"sarang tebuan","palak bulat","ball headed boy" and "round up cowboy".Sometimes they would stick something into my hair and just let it stick into me,if i refuse they would say i'm not sporting and open minded.
So i came up with a solution of cutting my hair short,i thought i was all over but i was wrong.They always had a name just in store for me.They would greet me and say,"kck na rmbut ko jat,kdk muka sek" i ingnored those comments..i still remember they called me "shit head".
That's what happened to me in the past,eventhough some of my friends keep encouraging me and try to gave me some confidence.But i still lack of it.
But everything changed when i came to kuching,my friends would say my hair is "rugged" or "kacak".they were encouraging me to keep my hair long or just maintain the same.But sometimes,i have to follow by the school rules.Whenever i cut my hair short,they would say "syg rmbut ko pendek,da x ensem gk.P kin macho." I'm really flatered by their comments and to be honest they never called me names or say hurtful thing to me.I really appreciate as friends and as best bro's.
But thing does'nt run as smoothly as i thought it would be,some people were just too over their heads.They would laugh at me when i cut my hair short,i remember them.
Sometimes when i cut my hair,i would lost self confidence,SERIOUSLY..I would'nt go out with my family or with my friends.I would stay at home doing nothing and try to gain back my confidence level quickly.
Now i'm not mad at her,i'm just very dissapointed.I did this because i don't wanna make you dissapointed in me and i don't want you to get fed up of reminding me to cut my hair.Senang crita la,panda mok jaga ati garfield and panda xda niat mok plh garfield sdih..I'm sorry if lately i don't wanna text you or call you.I just need a little time alone..Hope you understand.
Remember this,I STILL LOVE YOU NO MATTER WHAT and I REALLY MISS YOU.
Wednesday, 13 April 2011
IRRITATES AND WORRIES
It really piss me of when something is bothering me when i'm still on the phone with my lover.It's not her fault at all,i blame my handphone..Everytime i'm on the phone,her voice would sometimes fade and sometimes i can't hear her at all.I'm sorry garfield,panda x main2..panda x polah x dengar,panda nang mena2 x dengar garfield time garfield klaka.That's what trigger's anger and frustration.I'm sorry if we can only talk for a short period of time.
The other thing is,i'm very worry about her well-being.She complains that she's sometime feel very nausea and her back hurts and she often had a headache.Seriously,i'm very worry about her.I try to persuade her to go to see the doctor for check up,but she refuses to go.She says that she's fine and everything will be alright,but i'm pretty sure that she is still sick and needs medical attention.To me,she's going for a fever or it's her bone that causes this problem.
A couple months back,i still remember when she complains that her backbone hurts that she could'nt lie and she feels very cold.She vomit later that day,so i ask her to go see the doctor and she did.When she come back,she tells me that she's suffering from weak bones which causes all of those sickness and motion pain.It was an inherited disease.She once tell me that her sister suffer from the same illness as her does.Now i know what's her illness are,so i'm certain that she's suffer from the same illness again.
I'm just very worry about her that's all..If i were there with her,surely i WILL take her to see the doctor and i will force her to take the medicine.I'm not hurting her,i'm just censorn about her.I'm afraid that she will be very weak and vulnerable to other diseases..
I love her and i don't want anything happen to her..I just want her to know that i'm always loving her for the way she is and i'm always care about her wellness.I love you garfield,i really am..I pray that she will be alright and very will be fine.AMIN..
The other thing is,i'm very worry about her well-being.She complains that she's sometime feel very nausea and her back hurts and she often had a headache.Seriously,i'm very worry about her.I try to persuade her to go to see the doctor for check up,but she refuses to go.She says that she's fine and everything will be alright,but i'm pretty sure that she is still sick and needs medical attention.To me,she's going for a fever or it's her bone that causes this problem.
A couple months back,i still remember when she complains that her backbone hurts that she could'nt lie and she feels very cold.She vomit later that day,so i ask her to go see the doctor and she did.When she come back,she tells me that she's suffering from weak bones which causes all of those sickness and motion pain.It was an inherited disease.She once tell me that her sister suffer from the same illness as her does.Now i know what's her illness are,so i'm certain that she's suffer from the same illness again.
I'm just very worry about her that's all..If i were there with her,surely i WILL take her to see the doctor and i will force her to take the medicine.I'm not hurting her,i'm just censorn about her.I'm afraid that she will be very weak and vulnerable to other diseases..
I love her and i don't want anything happen to her..I just want her to know that i'm always loving her for the way she is and i'm always care about her wellness.I love you garfield,i really am..I pray that she will be alright and very will be fine.AMIN..
Saturday, 2 April 2011
WITH HER...
It's been 2 months with her and to be honest I didn't notice that we're already been together for about 2 months.From what i believe in,if we still love each other and work hard on our relationship...Insyaallah our relationship would take us to greater heights that we could achieve together.That greater heights is me marrying her.It's possible,but difficult.
I purposely said that because it's true.Our lives will change and maybe we'll have to go far away in order to pursue our dreams.But,if we still remember each other and believe in GOD,maybe our ultimate goal can someday be achieved by us.GOD will always throw something at us.Wether it's big or small,short or tall that obstacle is,but we still have to maintain or keep increasing our IMAN.That way,GOD will always keep us to stick to one another for a very very long time.
I believe in her and i trust her with all my heart.I love her for who she is and not for who she was.I kept a promise to her and myself that one day we will get MARRIED and have a family of our own.
The bottom line is that if we are very very devoted to one another,love each other with all our hearts,a hardwork in our relationship and the most of all is to pray that our relationship will last as long as it could.
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH AND I MISS YOU SO BADLY..I LOVE YOU AS MUCH AS I LOVE MY SUPRA AND I MISS YOU AS MUCH AS I MISS MY MOUSTACHE!
I purposely said that because it's true.Our lives will change and maybe we'll have to go far away in order to pursue our dreams.But,if we still remember each other and believe in GOD,maybe our ultimate goal can someday be achieved by us.GOD will always throw something at us.Wether it's big or small,short or tall that obstacle is,but we still have to maintain or keep increasing our IMAN.That way,GOD will always keep us to stick to one another for a very very long time.
I believe in her and i trust her with all my heart.I love her for who she is and not for who she was.I kept a promise to her and myself that one day we will get MARRIED and have a family of our own.
The bottom line is that if we are very very devoted to one another,love each other with all our hearts,a hardwork in our relationship and the most of all is to pray that our relationship will last as long as it could.
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH AND I MISS YOU SO BADLY..I LOVE YOU AS MUCH AS I LOVE MY SUPRA AND I MISS YOU AS MUCH AS I MISS MY MOUSTACHE!
Tuesday, 29 March 2011
LIFE AFTER SCHOOL
I admit it...it's hard once you leave school.No more laughing,cracking jokes,playing football after class,running here and there,having lunch with best friends,arguing about which team is better,jamming after school or after extra curricular activities and competing against one another....
It's kind a like apart of you which you hold on for so long,just leaving it behind and let it be...just like leaving a book on a shelve for quite a long time.
Well,let's face it...it's life.Leave the past behind and start all over.BUT...i won't forget those memories and i will treasure those memories for the rest of my life..I thank my friends for making this a very special and unforgetable memory...
One day,we'll cross path again..but looking very different and with a family of our own...
It's kind a like apart of you which you hold on for so long,just leaving it behind and let it be...just like leaving a book on a shelve for quite a long time.
Well,let's face it...it's life.Leave the past behind and start all over.BUT...i won't forget those memories and i will treasure those memories for the rest of my life..I thank my friends for making this a very special and unforgetable memory...
One day,we'll cross path again..but looking very different and with a family of our own...
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